Daunting Task!

I haven’t updated in over a month. I am scared to start writing again (because I’m lazy. not because I have anything scary to write). Lots of wonderful things have happened!

  • Greece! I went on a school trip to Greece and saw pretty much everything…unfortunately it is a little fuzzy in my head (school trips never feel real when you get back). It was an odd week getting stuck on top of the Acropolis during a mad thunderstorm, racing at Olympia, running around museums at night taking guerilla photographs (you aren’t allowed to pose with the statues so to get a cool photo you have to get creative), going to the Oracle at Delphi (so awesome up in the mountains), adventuring beneath the city of Mycenae, singing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” at Epidaurus and nearly killing Zoe (we shared a room. that is reason enough). I know that there is a lot to question in this paragraph but if you are reading this you were either on the trip or I have babbled at you about it. Or if you don’t fit into those categories you can just string it all together how you want (you should add in some lasers. The trip needed some more lasers)
  • Tookey and I saw Jonathan Coulton. I’m not sure how I can edit that sentence to show you my excitement. I SAW JONATHAN COULTON!   You know how it is- he is my favourite singer and I love him to pieces and it was the most awesome evening ever. (…it has been like three weeks and I am still hyper). I was also properly introduced to the music of Paul and Storm who were wonderfully funny and as soon as they finished their set me and Tookey looked at each other and started arguing about who was going to get up and buy their CDs (I went in the end). Aaarh and Jonathan was amazing and funny and he played some songs I didn’t know all that well (as well as cover versions of Birdhouse in your Soul by TMBG and Up the Junction by Squeeze- which made me excited) (oh! you can see the set list for the gig here! how cool is that?) and I didn’t mind that he rickrolled us during Mr Fancy Pants. Afterwards he stayed behind and so I got to meet him and I totally didn’t act like a creepy fangirl or anything (go me!):

a photo my dad thinks is creepy

This photo makes me so ridiculously happy

And I also met Paul and Storm (they were really excited about Tookey’s name. They were even more excited when she said they could call her “Tookles”):  

My dad probably finds this one creepier

Hell yeah Paul is wearing a Captain Hammer shirt!

And speaking of Captain Hammer: whilst waiting in line for these photos I was singing songs from Doctor Horrible’s Sing Along Blog with the guys behind me (one of them was being Moist in their university’s production! I hope it went well!). Tookey gave me a look for singing with strangers. But everyone there was just so nice! The atmosphere was fantastic! Hanging around with fellow nerds who wave macbooks instead of lighters (I also saw a companion cube when Jonathan sang “Still Alive”) and joining in whole-heartedly whether we were pretending to be pirates or zombies (I recently listened to the latter in french. I am just waiting for someone to write a musical of the french revolution with zombies so this song can get the recognition it deserves) (…it would work! We just need to get Kate Beaton onto this!)

ANYWAY. I’m sorry. That was a lot of rambling about JoCo. I also…went to my schools christmas fair…yay…(ooh actually that is a yay! they sold glittery rice krispy square things!) and got swine flu! I also became vaguely addicted to twitter (not updating it- just seeing what everyone else is doing) and MLIA.Hopefully interesting things will happen in the future: I might be going to see New Moon with Imogen (it depends if we can find some wizard robes and hufflepuff scarves in time. We aren’t going there to swoon over werewolf abs!) and I need to catch up on all the gossip and fling myself into trying to become philosopher of the week (never going to happen but I have my Aristotle bookmark to keep me company). Oh- I also read ‘One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest’ which I thought was pretty awesome (I kinda love Harding despite everything. It is because Kesey always goes on about how lovely his hands are!) but now I am reading ‘The Graveyard Book’ so I can understand why the internet seems to have a massive crush on him (looking through his website I can kinda understand- he seems adorable) (though he would be more adorable if he had a giant squirrel tail).

OH: I just remembered! Doctor Who! It has been so long since I have needed to say anything about it. I went over to Hannah’s house to watch it and meet all her shiny new friends (who were lovely and insane and one of the girls was wearing Hammer Pants) which was fun. It was a really depressing episode (with random bits which weren’t meant to be funny. Like slow-motion ceiling watching and the whole “LOOK AN OOOOOOOOD!” moment) and I cannot wait until the Christmas special. The Master is coming back! (…though why is he blonde? Do all evil villains go through a blonde phase?)


Attack of the overly Long Blog Posts! Showing Now!

Lots has been happening this week! Which might take a while to recount because i could get sidetracked because this blog is being powered by lots and lots of strawberry fruitellas (which is apparently the british starburst? who cares. thanks to the friendly cashier dude i bought a 4 pack and need more more more). Anyway, transport your mind back to last Sunday because that is when i had my birthday party. Which I didn’t really have a plan for because it would be too expensive to have like a real party (movie tickets! what is wrong with you Odeon!?!) andit is kinda hard to find one thing we all want to do. So we just rolled with it. The result was me, Hannah, Jess, Divya, Imogen, Zoe, Fia, Tookey and Suga crammed into my garage trying to play ping-pong with 3 bats, books, a spade (Imogen. why do i think she is sane?) and a biscuit tin lid (Divya was actually pretty skilled with that).

Why do I let these people into my house?

Why do I let these people into my house?


Wait, why am I allowed out of my house?

Wait, why am I allowed out of my house?

Then we ate fooooood (traditionally at my house we have to eat smiley faces and sausage rolls. and drink rootbeer. I think i managed to convert the Tookster and Suga to the Rootbeer cause) (oh- Tookey’s parents told her not to get drunk at my house with all us year 11s. I feel like i live in some badass house of sin or something) (not like rootbeer is alcoholic. just so so good). We also did the trek to blockbusters (also traditionally) and spent forever trying to rent movies we all liked (yeah the arguing at this point is also traditional. I mean, tackling Tookey wasn’t really necessary but it was very fun). We ended up watching Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist…we rented some other movies which we didn’t watch (oh well….it left time for us to watch The Princess Bride. Which was my plan all along muhahahahaha). Talking late into the night about randomness which was interesting because Tookey has not been subject to sleepover interrogation before. Or Imogen-Interrogation in the form of tennis ball truths etc. Terrifying but the Tookster handled it well. I also revealed that i have a fetish for purple men dressed as oxen who want to plough me (…i could explain this. but do you really want me to?) (note for your mental images: there is headbutting involved) (note to my mother, who has recently discovered facebook and may become good at internet-stalking in the future: it was a joke. A weird game of make believe) (shifting the attention off of myself…surely the best quote of the evening must have been zoe saying “hey! my spit looks like africa!”)

Oh present wise…Zoe gave me a book about Charles Manson (thanks for that), Jess gave me a book about a serial killer and the DVD of The Prince and Me 2 (…weirdest gift combo ever?) (oh she also gave me an awesome card. With a drawing of Rufus Wainwright on it. Wearing lederhosen. Tennis lederhosen) and Hannah gave me a book about some crazy dude (hey is there like a theme here?) (no the book looks really good.  It is called Cockroach by Rawi Hage). Suga gave me money (she didn’t get me a book because she thinks i am “so well read” and she also wrote in her card that she hopes i “don’t get something that convinces you that i am an assassin”. Suga is so adorable. She even called my room magical ♥) (Divya complained that my room had porn in it. It is a Toulouse-Lautrec painting! A painting of a hooker yes, but not a saucy one). Fia gave me a DVD of Labyrinth (squeee!) (oh, fia gets confused when i use non-words (like blerg. or flaaaargn. or smehneh etc.), so to translate: i was excited) and Divya gave me a DVD of Mona Lise Smile which I have never seen. Tookey gave me 2 Books: Gulliver’s Travels and the Prisoner of Zenda (my dad got excited because he has always wanted to read it because he has a nostalgic thing about the 1937 film and is always outraged that this version is never shown on TV) and Jeff Buckley’s CD Grace. I haven’t listened to it yet because….

I have been too busy listening to DFTBA Records: Volume One! A present from Imogen so awesome it comes from overseas, the envelope was decorated with stars and it gets it’s own little paragraph because I love it so much. I have been listening to it constantly. Favourites: “The Anglerfish Song” by Hank Green because it has to be the catchiest song ever, “Can’t” by Alan Lastufka 6 and Tom Milsom because i love the use of the inkjet printer noise for percussion and the tune makes me want to the macarena robot style, “Exterminate, Regenerate” by Chameleon Circuit which i have already given much love to, “In the Absence of Christmas” by Charlie McDonnell because it crazy original and yes, a little sad but in a good way (oh hey- did anyone get that Charlie was the inspiration for the whole “purple-oxen-men” comment? so yes: i am sorry Charlie that that is what happens to you in my head. So sorry), “Porphyrophobia” by Tom Milsom (damn this list is long), “The Nonsense Song” by Michael Aranda gets on my favourites probably because i just love the idea of a magic grilled cheese sandwich and finally “I Pity the Fu” by Molly Lewis because it is a song about Mr T. Accompanied by the ukulele. With some kick-ass lyrics. (plus Molly Lewis is a Coulton fan so of course she is going to be awesome and write songs with crazy lyrics)

Aaarh so anyway that was fun. But then work experience had to begin sometime so i have been kicking it old-school shall we say with the Museum of London Early History Department. Hell yeah. I got to label pieces of prehistoric flint baby. And an assortment of random artifacts (you can see my labelling skills if you ever go and like handle the the broken pots and animal bones. Or flint from box 3, flints from number 189-284) (yes i did label 95 rocks. And yeah that involves coating them in nail varnish. And yes i did end up spilling ink all over the carpet on my first day but who cares because i can pretend i am an awesome archaeologist lady). What was actually cool was going into the basement and going through drawers of Medieval ironwork because the senior curator who specialises in Medieval stuff is retiring (he knows so much it was so scary, but he is really nice) and so the other curators are trying to “download his brain” before he leaves. Drawers and drawers of badges, rings, brooches, stuff-which-is-linked-to-Thomas-Beckett (the dude clearly got around…his…blacksmiths?) and horse-stuff (spurs: have more potential for innuendo than i would have thought) and lots of keys (they also are also apparently overflowing with spoons. Kinda like my spoon drawer. Spoons are evil dammit).

Oh you know what else i did? I investigated a pottery fragment and for one afternoon became an expert in pottery marks and dived into the mysterious world of heraldry. Oh my god why on earth do people write books about pottery? Are these people actually alive? Now Heraldry. It is just insane. These people are insane. All the crazy terminology and symbolism and rules! It could be fascinating if it wasn’t so damn scary. I mean you could fill a book, in fact there are probably too many books, about the rules about Coats of Arms for illegitimate children. And what happens to the Coat of Arms if, like with John of Gaunt’s and Katherine Swynford’s children, they become legitimate. Aaarh.

It is also my job to design an activity sheet for small children about the River Thames. Throughout the fucking ages. So i had to go through all the galleries and write down anything about the Thames (easier than i thought until i hit 1558-1666. Our paths cross again Mr Cromwell. But this, i have the advantage. Because i have a clipboard andyou are behind a display case. Suck on that bitch). Okay, i actually had some fun coming up with questions and trying to be “fun”. (i did entertain a fantasy that it was future me, who owns a time machine, who threw all this stuff into the Thames, just so i had more questions to ask. I mean, stealing viking swords and carving curses into tablets in latin would be awesome). So if you like to feel smart by doing easy quizzes, come to the Museum on August 1st or 2nd and pick up a sheet.

The Museum is nice, i get tea and high-quality biscuits and everyone is lovely to me. Plus i get like a badge to beep myself in and out of security doors. It feels kinda cool (it would be cooler if the staff entrance to the office section wasn’t next to the toilets).

In other news: Tookey lent me season 1 of 30 Rock and I am enjoying it, i have been wearing lots of skirts this week and i think i like it, i only got1/5 when Charlie presented Truth and Fail so i should have to upload a video of me doing the macarena backwards (the question i got right is the one about William Shakespeare’s will because i always remember how everyone makes a point of saying “second best bed”), tomorrow is Hannah’s birthday party so hopefully that should be fun and this is also the only time i see Hannah’s outside school friends Ella and Scarlett (which is a shame because they are both so nice and they are probably more up to date on Ellen-in-jokes than Ellen is) (unfortunately Ellen couldn’t make it to my party because she was seeing Lang-Lang in concert).

IN MAJORLY IMPORTANT NEWS Jess has swine flu. So warm fuzzies for Jess, even if she might not appreciate them because having swine flu makes her grumpy. But still she may finally update her blog (oh she actually did the early hours of yesterday! go Jess!) so you should check it out (link the sidebar!) if you want to wish her well/angry ladies turn you on.

(oh God in a post around the same length as some of my english essays i actually missed stuff out. Notably: i finally finished The Portrait of a Lady after an embarresingly long time. I was not entirely happy with the ending. Then read all of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows one night because Imogen challenged me and i am sick of being shown up in front of other nerds. I did like it, more than Half-Blood Prince I think, but yeah…I agree the epilogue sucks majorly.  Not sure what I am going to read next. But it is likely it will feature creepy people).

Happy Tesla Day!

I’m sure if you have been on google today (and who hasn’t?) you will have noticed that today is the anniversary of Nikola Tesla’s birth. Now I hate physics. But i think Tesla himself was rather adorable (actually i think i have already mentioned this. yeah, i definitely remember posting something about wanting to be his personal moustache groomer). This is possibly because he was kinda insane and became obsessed with one of his pigeons(so maybe today everyone should be really nice to pigeons in his honour? i mean feel free to try and kill them every other day…)  and claimed to have invented some kind of death ray (he was also friends with Mark Twain which would be cool. I really want to read this graphic novel where they team up to defeat Thomas Edison) (oh see now Twain and Tesla are having some kind of free-style rap contest with Edison in my head. Not entirely sure why. But see Tesla once said whilst demonstrating something “see my motor here; watch me reverse it” which sounds like he is actually doing some crazy hip-hop thing. Dammit maybe even a hip hop thang). (Plus Bowie once played Tesla in a film. surely that makes him cool?) (….GAH Twain, Tesla and Bowie singing in my head. Edison looking on all moodily)

I don't even know if that is Tesla, but it is awesome

I don't even know if that is Tesla, but it is awesome

Anyway not much is happening for me tonight. Err tonight is actually  Prom night so most people are constantly facebooking about trying to get ready for that, but I’m not going (which only makes me feel nerdier because i watched the episode Spock’s Brain yesterday and now find that even typing the word brain makes me laugh. “Take…take him where?” “In search of his brain, doctor”. Probably the most hilariously awful thing i have ever seen). Though tomorrow I’m having some rather late birthday celebrations (nothing is actually planned, I’m just throwing together some friends, food and films and seeing what happens) which should hopefully be fun.

I am going to attempt some music news:

  • Funk: i am not sure why my brother, who reads Pitchfork and loves Animal Collective, has downloaded a lot of funk but he has. Maybe he has some kind of crush on George Clinton because all he  just downloaded Parliament, Funkadelic and yes, Parliament-Funkadelic along with Clinton’s solo work (it would be funny if he we both had creepy crushes on Clintons). Groovy bass lines and lyrics ranging from generic (don’t worry about being right just be for real!) to weird ad libs (…yeah just the whole of Atomic Dog. I don’t know what it means but it is indeed funky) makes it fun to listen to
  • Transmittens: the most ridiculously cute sounding pop music, i downloaded some of their free tracks off last.fm and do enjoy it when they pop up on shuffle but not what i usually like
  • Music from my childhood: well I’ll be damned. Fred, friend of aforementioned indie-fucktard brother, has already beaten me to blogging about this. He even included Aqua dammit! Though the similarity ends there (well apart from with Afroman. But who doesn’t love Afroman?) because when i was younger i didn’t have my trusty radio or the internet or friends with even a little bit of taste. So actually the music i loved was from musicals or stuff played at the school disco. But there was one totally amazing song (which i have had stuck in my head recently) which Fred missed. One song which just made everything that much more awesome. One totally ridiculous song with an appalling, yet presumably intentional, spelling mistake in the title. Hot in Herre.

To sum up: i am feeling kinda sad.

Yes! No more physics ever! And yes, latin prose went fine, but background was a little weird (fortunately, i came up with enough archaeological evidence about available jobs not to mention prostitution or the whole “a penis on a sign means a bakery” thing)…(though i really think we should begin to call Brothels “Lupanare” because “House of the She-Wolves” sounds pretty awesome…or at least i’m pretty sure that’s how it’s translated. Or it could be “Lair of the She-Wolves”)…(then again how often to brothels come up in normal conversation?)…(which excludes conversations with Zoe and people of her ilk)

Anyway, brothels aside, my grandparent’s birthday gift arrived today. Which was one of those Tiffany Charm Bracelets which completely surprised me, but my mother was all “oh yeah i guess it’s just a traditional sweet 16 thing”. Like seriously? I guess that’s nice but it made me slightly upset that my grandparents would spend $210 (at current exchange rate that is roughly  £128.50 making it the most expensive gift i have probably ever received) on a bracelet which to be honest i probably won’t wear that often because wearing things just because they are expensive is kinda stupid. I really would have been much happier if they had bought me a book or something. It makes me upset because my grandparents clearly have no idea what kind of person I am and yeah i know this is my fault as well and we hardly see each other because of the distance and even when i am with them i tend to avoid them because frankly they creep me out…gah. It’s really nice and all i just wish they were more lovable.

(it’s good to know that if i have kids they totally won’t have this problem because my mum is totally physched about her potential grandchildren and will be one of those nice, huggable grandparents who secretly slip you money and ice cream. If those exists. I’m really just guessing here, wikipedia doesn’t have articles about the different sub-types of grandparents)

Music News: Imogen made me listen to two songs by Chameleon Circuit today! Chameleon Circuit being a Trock band (and by Trock i of course mean Timelord rock) and all their songs are about Doctor Who and so i listened to “Exterminate Regenerate” which is pretty damn catchy (and yes, agreed with Imogen. Charlie’s vocals sound pretty hot) and “journey’s end” which was a nice re-cap of the last episode (it is always nice to see them daleks) and thus gave me flashbacks of all the little emotional bits i had forgotten.

In other music news- my headphones don’t work. This majorly sucks. And i guess it technically isn’t news, but music-wise i have had “Communist Daughter” stuck in my head throughout exams which makes it difficult to concentrate because i don’t know the words. I was in latin, translating in my head, and it went like this “every nation of the Gauls is greatly devoted to the communist, the communist daughter standing on the seaweed water religions and for that reason semen stains the mountain topsthose who are affected by more serious illnesses…” though really just “semen stains the mountain tops” going round my head over and over in Jeff Mangum’s weird voice (i actually find the song really relaxing because a part of the background music sounds like waves fwooshing in…fwooshing out…)

I actually have to try and work out a way of making a group on facebook so we can appreciate Fia’s blog together (Suga needs to create a blog to complete the circle: Suga made me a blog appreciation, i am making fia one nowish, fia made one for imogen, imogen will make one for jess and then jess can make one for Suga! can you feel the love we all have for our blogs?) (no i am not really feeling the love tonight. not even updates from Bill Clinton on facebook will make me feel better) (though really i shouldn’t be indulging in self-pity because i only have two exams left and some people, good luck Jess, have three. which means they have more suck to deal with) (i’m not entirely sure why i am all moody but maybe if i use enough brackets i can sort this out).

Our Love is like an open-faced sandwich table.

I have decided that Mahler just might like ice cream. He definitely needs ice cream. The concert on Saturday was amazing as usual- particularly the second movement of the Shostakovitch piano concerto no. 2 and the end of Mahler’s first symphony. Though that is one long symphony and i kept thinking it was going to end…and then kept getting distracted by the women next to me itching (she was itching like crazy!) and checking her phone (which was not meant to be on! i should report you to like…Royal Festival Hall police! if they existed). The guy who played the piano concerto, Martin Helmchen, is apparently an up and coming star who has been receiving rave reviews and you could totally see/hear why. He played this complicated piece (at least- complicated to me. but i have since been assured by people who know things about music it is difficult) amazingly well and hes only like 25 (my mum kept on going “aaaw would you look at him! he’s so fragile and delicate!”).  Vladimir Jurowksi was his usual, awesome self (i am slightly worried that if i go to a concert and he is not conducting it i will just freak out).

That was around it for this weekend. I am obviously just not qualified to talk about classical music. I mean, i came home and then had a long discussion about hair metal with Fia (we now have a joke that she is covering up an obsession with Joe Jonas and i am madly in love with Bret Michaels, lead singer of Poison). I also came home to a dinner of potato smiley faces and cocktail sausages which was pretty awesome. Other than that i have been revising (biology mock tomorrow!) and trying to read Pale Fire by Nabokov because…because i was bored and it was on the bookshelf. (don’t get me wrong- some revision wasn’t boring. For instance- our double circulatory system= epic win. I love learning about the heart- it all seems so ridiculously efficient and…the word that comes to mind is edible for some reason…).

I was going to read The Golden Notebook which i bought ages ago, but then i read preface and just decided i might just not because i found Doris Lessing to be absolutely insufferable. I mean, it was very clear that she is exceptionally intelligent and a good writer but i kinda hate her so i stopped (which is actually something she herself advises…however she also says to remember that books you dislike now you might love in the future…). Its probably a bad idea to judge to book on the preface. I might try reading it after exams- which is this magical period of time where anything and everything is possible.

 I just got the feeling Doris Lessing won’t get on very well with the people in my head (yes, i know how weird that sounds but anything which i read/watch/hear is then discussed by the head-people and i guess which stance they would take on the thing in question. though right now they are trying to remember if there is a word which comes between “like” and “love” because this has been bothering me. So they have decided that in that awkward phase when “like” is too weak a word but they’re worried that saying “love” would just be a bit weird they will say “i smorgasbord you”. because its a fun word indeed, that stage of a relationship is like an open-faced sandwich table. And you have been sitting at this table for a while, decorating it, getting used to it, becoming comfortable. You have eaten like, quite a full portion of the table, but there are still many new experiences to be…eaten…new flavours and aromas on this glorious table which contains both the bad sandwiches and the good (and you are getting better at telling the difference between the two)! However you are still unsure if you are ready to commit to this particular open-faced sandwich table in the long term.)

(okay…i have no idea what i was talking about then. i think i was meant to be talking about books…but i could probably just extend that metaphor for a few more paragraphs…)

My Musical (featuring Killer Robots!)

Happy Easter! Or, the more awesome holiday being celebrated today, happy Cosmonautics Day! I was not actually expecting to have a particularly good easter this year because my parents are masters of deception and had convinced me that i was to receive no eggs this year (it is particularly painful when they do this at christmas, or when it turns out they weren’t actually lying). Although because our garden is currently flooded and overgrown the easter egg hunt was limited to the conservatory and stone-outsidey-place-where-the-washing-line-is. I got 3 eggs and an easter bunny- which was reason enough to do a little celebratory dance to “U Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer and spend the rest of the day wearing a scarf tied around my head and hoop earrings pretending to be a pirate (i was re-reading Lord of the Flies today, which explains why i needed a distraction). I hope everyone else had a good easter! (its weird how even when i was younger and went to a CoE primary school and had to go to church etc. easter was never about Jesus. Ah well.  Enjoy your candy!)

Other than chocolate it has been an amazingly boring time recently. Still pretending to revise. Still reading What is the What which is as depressing and also as amazing as ever. (actually so bored i stopped blogging to try and beat my high score on Snake Extreme 2 on my phone. gah).

In an attempt to beat the boredom i have been listening to The Aquabats, which is weird because i don’t usually listen to ska/rock…people pretending to be superheroes. Though i think more people should dress up as superheroes! I would personally enjoy it if they weren’t so tight and made of spandexy. I was thinking earlier about trying to make up a very cool super villain and ended up just deciding that if anyone was going to take over the earth i would want it to be Jonathon Coulton in a top hat and monocle.

(okay: this is future me writing when reading over this post. this next bit goes a tad crazy. my sincere apologies)

See, i was listening to ABBA earlier (yes. i am slightly ashamed) and decided that the songs could have been used to make a way cooler musical!. One about…killer robots. As in, Super Troopers.  And i decided to chuck in songs by Jonathan Coulton and the Silver Jews as well (because…i am not sure why). And then i remembered the song Super Trooper was all about how someone loved and was comforted by them so i decided that maybe some poor woman made them to be her husband substitute after he was murdered. And JoCo steals these robots and reprogrammes them to be evil world taking over robots. Thus twisting “Does Your Mother Know” from a cheesy and slightly pervy pop song to a threatening refrain sung whilst shooting teenagers who break curfew. It would also be fun to choreograph a dance to “Todd the T100” and of course, those who disobey are sent to Chiron Beta Prime (i love that song!).

Anyway. David Berman, our hansome-ish anti-hero, and his wife Cassie are hanging out past curfew (cue: Punks in the Beerlight) and are surprised by killer robots who steal Cassie to take back to JoCo (cue: Skullcrusher Mountain) and David Berman mourns (cue: The Winner takes it All, then lots of other songs as his mourning progressess. I guess Sometimes a Pony gets Depressed and then maybe when hes more suicidal My Pillow is the Threshold). So he decides he will defeat and gathers up some sidekicks! He gets Code Monkey (cue the song) who decided to hand in his resignation to boring manager Rob and become a superhero in order to win the heart of the secretary, he saves Tom (from Re: Your Brains) from hordes of zombies and gets  Leonard Nimoy to try and stop him mourning over his short lived affair with Bigfoot (Under the Pines). So he gathers them all around, explains his plan (by singing Take a Chance on Me obviously) then decide to make their headquarters on the party barge (…cue Party Barge).

So now they need to find JoCos hiding place. They happen to come across the crazy lady who started it all who tells them where to find him (cue: There is a Place). So they make their way to Skullcrusher mountain where Cassie is still imprisoned (i can’t decide what song this should be! maybe she could have befriended one of the guards who sings Chiquitita to her. Or maybe she sings Candy Jail in bitter tones!). David Berman and his sidekicks manage to defeat the hungry mountain wolves, though one manages to bite David’s hand off (cue: SOS)….

Okay that is as far as i got. It is just a rough outline of this…musical thing. It probably doesn’t make that much sense if you don’t know the songs, but even without that knowledge i believe it could be awesome. Especially since it has killer robots in (which makes anything pretty awesome). And seeing as David Berman said he might go into writing screenplays…

…i am running out of ideas for titles…

My blog is currently my safe, Internethaven where i can hide away from people desperately trying to get reading tickets. Also because as my school is a tad weird we celebrated World Book Day today and therefore i spent the day dressed as Neville, showering all my love and affection on a plant which many peopleinsisted was dead (Droopy, as i so christened him, is not dead. he just wants you to think that so he can trap you into stroking his lovely soft leaves until you are in a passive state and he can strangle you! muahahaha!).  People should stop hating on Droopy and me (the mocking was headed by Fia who drew a cute comic of it and i mention it so i can go “Link the sidebar!!!” like John and Hank Green, only obviously you cannot see me doing the finger moustache. if this bracket confused you: do yourself a favour and search for vlogbrothers).

So i am thus feeling a little disjointed from stuff- mainly because i kinda hate Thom Yorke and just Radiohead in general for some reason (oh- this links back to the whole Reading thing). Really no idea why- i mean, i don’t like their music or anything but that doesn’t explain why i just feel the urge to bash Thom’s smug face. Or it could be that generally when i overhear people talking about how they love Radiohead, its people i don’t like. I just realised i like no one who is playing at Reading this year…that is so weird (would i sound like an amazing tosser if i said that i liked some of Kings of Leon’s early stuff? before they got to no. 1?). But i guess that’s a good thing.  Not like i can claim to have good music taste. Listening to Snakebite by Alice Cooper just because its hilarious. I also tried listening to some of the…let me see if i can get this right…virtual instrumental post-metal band Deathmøle (if anyone gets that nerdy webcomic reference then i salute you. now officially up to date with that- yes, i have read several years worth of comic archives and now believe that they are all real people). Its not actually that bad, but i find it hard to listen to instrumental stuff (apart from classical music obviously….jesus i really feel like i ought to be shot. i swear its just because this is being typed out. i don’t sound so awful in my head but i guess enough of you know my head well enough to know that isn’t saying much).

Anyway: other events. Err…last friday my school participated in the Schools Question Time competition! So some people (some friends of mine amongst them) organised a panel ect. and food (lots of lovely food) and the whole evening was pretty awesome. As chairperson there was Emily Maitlis of BBC news (it was slightly scary because i forget the anchorpeoplehave legs) and as normal panel people: David Aaronavitch (Timesjournalist, probably the best person that evening), Stephanie Flanders (BBC economics editor), Iain Dale (conservative party activist who wore a horribly flamboyant shirt), Edward Davey (Lib Dem MP for Kingston and Robert Evans (member of the European parliament for the labour party, who i disliked).  Discussion centred on: economic crisis (durr), faith in Gordon Brown, Obamarama!, A* results being introduced at A Level and university fees, Palestine and Israel and Jade Goody (yeah…the fact that she was discussed more than the Palestine/Israel issue was kinda depressing). Also good about QT: i totally bonded with Rachel, who is in the year below and so cool she wore an Obama t-shirt. We also had some weird running joke about us acting like a lesbian couple, its nice to have jokes with someone i don’t actually know that well (but i do think shes really quite awesome. she is the cats pyjamas as i have taught her to say).

On Sunday I went round Twickenham’s many charity shops with Jess, Hannah and Fia which was nice. Other than that the weekend was pretty chilled, especially reading Love in the Time of Cholera in my bubble bath 🙂  which i am enjoying so far but is not quite as awesome as 100 Years of Solitude or The General in his Labyrinth. Though  It has made me worried that i am going to start drinking cologne and eating rose petals. That seems like exactly the kind of creepy, obsessive thing i would do. But as far as eating things in Marquez book’s goes, the descriptions of Rebeca eating dirt and whitewash are probably the best (see- some of the characters in 100 Years of Solitude are amazing and haunting, others….like, the whole of the third generation…i found more annoying. Maybe if i knew more about the history of Latin America than the civil war business might make more sense).

Anyway, i believe it is safe to come out of hiding.

p.s Jess has started to update her blog again- link in the side bar! (its Queen of Sanssouci. Hell yeah we love Rufus Wainwright).

No Gnews is good Gnews!

Rawr, it has been a while since i have updated (but i do go through all my stats to boost my ego. might seriously consider doing some Nisus and Euryalus fanfic one of these days…i miss doing the literature so much. Although i do think “Verbs of Fearing” would be an awesome band name, and on friday we go over gerundives! yays for awesome literal translations!) probably because i don’t have as much work to avoid (that’s a lie actually, i have quite a bit of work) and because i have three new webcomics I’m reading (because I’m cool like that) and so i went through all their archives (xkcd: god i love it and its so addictive, but it makes me wish i was a mathematician/physicist, Questionable Content: because i care more about fictional characters’ suffering than i do my real acquaintances’ and Nedroid Picture Diary: makes me fuzzy inside).

Oh- i have also ditched writing to repeatedly listening to Alice Cooper and, on Saturdays, Alice’s radio show (if only i lived in Wichita and could listen to his sweet, sweet voice every night…). He plays some pretty rad music (yes i said rad. I’m just trying it out. god i forgot how much i love the brackets) and his attempts at a British accent are hilarious. Never listen when dead tired and he is playing trippy rock, it lead to some weird facebook commenting (I’m really worried that in the future, instead of famous people having collected letters, it will be collected facebook posts. handwriting is a lost art. but Elyanne-a.k.a my biology partner- gave me hope by showing me the funky handwriting she uses in her maths notebook) about how Alice Cooper is a giant cookie with arms, legs, top hat covering the crazy hair  and a cane!(Fia drew me a picture. it makes my soul happy). I have spent many a evening trying to decide which Alice Cooper song has the worst lyrics- this is impossible, but here are the main contenders thus far:

  • ” wanna put my hands where they’ve never been
    Get real hot in the midnight steam
    Soaking in the rain of my favorite dream
    Your lips are red, the moon is blue
    I only ask you once what you want to do” from I Got a Line on You
  • “Don’t need no roof overhead
    Don’t need no key to unlock ya baby, I’ll use my lovin instead” from House of Fire (actually, the whole concept of Alice singing about building a house made out of love is hilarious…though it creeps me out when he says he wants to play in her garden)
  • “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow
    Gonna drive you like a hammer
    Baby, put me in your slammer” from Bed of Nails (oh Alice- what were you thinking?)
  • Oh, the intro to Bed of Nails is just plain awful. It sounds like it was written by me at my most angsty year 8 phase when i thought badges were the ultimate accessory and wrote diary entries about (*flicks through notebooks quickly*- how weird) how everybody i know should just get over themselves already:

“I love the way you hurt me.
My tears are your wine.
Your thoughts would draw my plan for a cruise in vain,
Like talons in the pale moon shining above us.
My gained pleasure in pain is slowly vanished
As we sink deeper and deeper into a void of your venomous love”


(sorry- real life thing: the water in my house may not be working and everything is stressy and i haven’t been able to wash my hair properly and school photos are tomorrow and apparently the garden has been flooded for several weeks and i didn’t notice…wait. apparently shower is working again. that’s just great)

Anyway: actual events! going to write about them! Two weeks ago, me and some friends went collecting money for Marie Curie Cancer Care. This was actually pretty fun…even if we were dressed up as Harry Potter characters for Imogen’s party (more about that later) and I got a surprising amount of money (well, it seemed like it- some lady gave me a tenner! and another a fiver! much love to those crazy charity lovin’ ladies). This was actually the day after Red Nose Day, me and Hannah slept over at Jess’ house to drool over David Tennant (yeah…we switched off after they changed hosts. How adorable is that man? How cute was it when he won Mastermind? How ridiculous does he look and act when he’s not scripted? How wrong is it that we know all wish we were Davina McCall?) and to watch the first series of Peep Show. Happy Days 🙂

Imogen’s party was Harry Potter themed- i went as Professor Trelawney. It was pretty awesome: excellent party foods, fun games (pin the tail on the thestrel!) and conversations and watched a bit of Juno. ooh! Anna! Obviously taking style tips from my blog: grey hair powder! it looked awesome! I was totally right about bringing this back.

(Speaking of fashion, i got into an argument with my brother about which one of us is allowed to go steampunk. I think if you look at my online history, you will see that i have been looking into this for a while. Its perfect! Goggles! Pith hats! Watch parts. Though actually i just began looking into it because late last saturday whilst repeatedly listening to Suffragette City i decided that i should become Nikola Tesla’s moustache keeper (he didn’t like touching human hair, therefore needs someone to do it for him! that someone is me! Yes Tesla, i will groom your moustache to perfection!) and Tesla figures big in like steampunk graphic novels etc. Maybe also because steampunk makes me think of Ironforge- one of my favourite places in World of Warcraft (dammit, i hate to admit this but i miss WoW! i loved my sexy Nightelf! Also pissed because i didn’t have the subscription, it was my brother so i only got one character who i never managed to get past level 30  and a Tauren who i only played for jokes whilst my brother’s dwarf was riding around on a friggin’ mountain goat!…god that sounded weird). Also just a deep love of watch parts. mmm.

Nerdlove and Alice Cooper aside, i actually got round to listening to my audio CDs of Dreams from my Father…ready Barack himself. It is just so relaxing to listen to Barack…whilst hugging my stereo. His childhood in Indonesia just sounds incredible. Will need to listen to more tonight.

Not much has been happening at all. School is cramming in last topics or revising. I’ve been feeling more tired than usual and have some weird throat problems where one minute i sound like i am dying of thirst in the desert and the next i am back to normal. ON mother’s day i thoughtfully took my lovely mum to go see Gran Torino (i also gave her a chocolate lamb called “Lucy the Lamb” because my mum is called Lucie) which was really awesome. Clint suited that role so well and it was surprisingly funny. I also thought the girl who played Sue, Ahney Her, was really good. The disturbing thing is that watching it confirmed that i have a creepy crush on Clint Eastwood who will be 80 this May (okay it was just adorable when he was all “I am oldschool!” and considering how old he is, he looks amazing ). So creepiness aside…it was a great film and i totally recommend it (so does my chemistry teacher dammit. i was hoping we would disagree over this one, so made up for it by yelling at him about how much he likes “Shakespeare in Love”). I love going to the cinema later in the evening, its more relaxed, the staff seem nicer and there are less people (which means less people to see me doing funny dances in the foyer).

 Aside from Alice Coopering, i decided to put all my favourite Frank Sinatra tracks and the soundtrack to South Pacific on my mp3 player thing…I’ve been getting weird looks on the bus.  Jess lent me Teddy Thompson’s A Piece of What you Needmy favourite tracks: “In my Arms” and “What’s This?!!”  and “Jonathan’s Book” though “Turning the Gun on Myself” is excellent for accompanying my solitaire games.

Goodnight, i hope i have something more interesting to talk about next time.

(p.s if you realised which Gnews show i was referencing in the title than i love you! if not, i’m pretty sure i wrote a blog all about it once)

(p.p.s gah! this was meant to go up last night dammit! and update for all those who may care: the water is not working! but its fine because Jess leant me more Teddy and Rufus because she is amazing like that♥)

I am…hating Sasha Fierce

According to my dear friend Mr Wikipedia, the story of The Lion King is (très loosely obviously) based on Hamlet. Bleh? Bleh! Since when? But i can forgive the creator because he wrote…The Brave Little Toaster. Oh. My. God. Thomas M. Disch is a man after my own heart! Lampy (a…Lamp) , Blanky (an electric blanket), Radio (a fridge. not), Hoover (a hooverlicious hoover. yes i said hooverlicious. I have history coursework on FDR, i am allowed to go a little weird about Presidents…not like i don’t do that anyway..ellipsis- i use them too much…) and Toaster (you’re sick of these distracting brackets aren’t you?) on a quest to find their owner- referred to as “The Master”. Which is weird, but reminds me of Doctor Who so ultimately its all good. Now, i have never read this book or seen the films, but i am feeling an awful lot of love right now. Because i love inanimate objects (particularly kitchen appliances) and have actual once written a short story about a man (called Adam, just so i could make a bible joke) who is friends can hear inanimate objects talking. I think he knows it isn’t real, but if he stopped hearing them then he would go insane (well, more insane). Like he talks to his kettle and his wallet…some of them don’t talk. But they make noises. Mwee hee hee. Anyway, he falls in love with a radiator (inspired by and named after Hannah). Anyway…um, yeah. I guess that’s a weird thing to admit to writing. But i really enjoyed it. Because i talk to inanimate objects and people in my head and yes, this is starting to worry me.

But hey- you know who has been creeping me out recently? Beyoncé, Seriously, the video for Single Ladies (put a ring on it) is dead scary. With her crazy muscular thighs, the Terminator-esque bionic hand and of course the fast-paced dance moves, i swear at some point she looks like she is pretending to be a teapot (I’m a little teapot short and stout…) and the hands-on-hip-running-in-high-heels was just very very Roadrunner (or maybe that was just me. don’t get me wrong, i love Roadrunner but i wouldn’t mind seeing Wiley Coyote just take a big bite out of him. and Roadrunner would be like “oh no you didn’t!” and Coyote would just be able to swagger away all cool whilst the smug bastard bleeds to death…) Also i swear her face has changed! Changed!!! What happened to really cool and bootylicious Beyoncé? I mean, that evil grin at the end! Speaking as a fan of evil grins–it is awful. Really bad. Maybe because you just can’t take  I mean come on- the song seriously so you can’t take her “ooh i am just so independent and evil!” act very seriously either. And how come she gets an alter ego? I am so mad at her and “Sasha Fierce” and oh my god what kind of name is that for an alter ego?  An alter ego who needs a bionic arm…honestly. It is apparently her “sensual and aggressive” side. Wait- isn’t Beyoncéalready very sensual and when need be aggressive? This Sasha Fierce thing just comes across as a very bad joke and complete over indulgence. Why introduce some alter ego now anyway when Sasha Fierce was “born” in 2003? I mean…what is with that? Why does she even need a strictly-for-stage alter ego? Is it just a stunt to keep things fresh and make her appear more interesting? You aren’t David Bowie! I don’t know why this makes me annoyed so much, lots of singers etc. take on alter egos. Christina Auguleira (X-Tina), Mariah Carey (Mimi, funnily enough this used to be the name of one of my old alter egos.) Britney (Mona Lisa), Janet Jackson (Damita Do…hahahaha), heck even Norah Jones has a freakin’ alter ego (as Maddie- lead singer of punk rock group El Madmo who i have just myspaced and rather like actually). Maybe its because i actually used to like Beyonce because as i always thought she didn’t (always) act like a vain, stupid, party girl and you know that was nice. It was nice. And so i am pissed off she wants to feel a bit bad-ass or somehow “out there” and maybe she does really feel she needs an alter ego but it all seems so pointless (you could point out that having a massive rant about it is also pointless). And when will people realise doing things in black and white is not really that new or exciting or necessary especially since If I Were a Boy was also in black and white (yeah, i can’t get my camera to take pictures in monochrome-damnation)?.

Turkey and Tchaikovsky

Yays! Today is Thanksgiving! Um..yes i am in England but seeing as this is my mother’s favourite holiday (apparently because she just really liked drawing pilgrim hats. but not the shoes. she hates the shoes) and it was my brother’s 21st birthday yesterday so getting together today meant he could get smashed last night. It also means i get to make brownie! And give it to my history class because today we are starting coursework which happens to be on the New Deal so we can pretend its related. Also history is my smallest class so there is enough brownie to go round. Most importantly i guess i like everyone in my history class…the same can not really be said about my form group (yes, i willingly accept candy on their birthdays but never actually hand out my own. i just make brownie and I’ve it to my friends. And my biology teacher…i gave him brownie today in fact. whilst he was wearing Lycra…yeah never mind).

And it has been just a really nice day. I mean, not really because i get to do anything except have the ridiculously large meal (am recovering as I type. god i love turkey) but last night i went to go see Vladimir Jurowski conduct an amazing concert at the Royal Festival Hall. Starting with Le Martyre de Saint Sébastien y Debussy which was nice but nothing spectacular…and then Rachmaninov’s Second piano concerto and Tchaikovsky’s sixth symphony, the pathetique. Oh my god words cannot describe how amazing it was to see those live. Sitting right next to the orchestra. Have now decided love the choir stalls at the Royal Festival Hall…they meant i could see Jurowski. Right behind the double-bassists as well. Who all have really nice hands. so does Jurowski. I could talk about his hands all day probably. Don’t get me started on his wrists. See, after seeing him preform (this is the second time I’ve seen him) such emotional, romantic music and actually controlling the music which made me sometimes forget to breathe (or maybe i’m just that stupid) and i was occasionally on the verge of tears (listen! i listened to it on CD before going, but it really isn’t the same) i now have this weird, completely non-physical (except the hands. he isn’t actually attractive…except on the front cover of the programme. he looks all smouldering and über-Russian) crush on him. I am just madly in love with his conducting skills.

So i was in this insanely good, stumbling around mood after for some reason getting home nearly in tears (no actual reason just feeling so bloody awful) and so i was in this blissful mood today. And just went around wishing everyone a happy thanksgiving in this slightly odd, nervous voice (“i…i want you to be happy…please accept my best wishes on this holiday which you don’t celebrate. and have no clue what its about…neither do i really”).

SO yes, i know this blog had no real structure or purpose i just wanted to say how much i love Jurowski and thanksgiving and sweet potato cooked with oranges (actually tastes really nice) and corn pudding (i have been wanting to eat this again for like 6 years- it did not disappoint) and yeah, to thank my friends. I think Suga is the only person who really reads my blog but if you guys stumble across it i would just like to say how amazing you are (yes, i probably should tell you that more often in person but it sounds so cheesy even now) and how you always make me happy in some way everyday. Except you know weekends. When we can’t be bothered to see each other. But hey. Thanks and i hope everyone had a great thanksgiving. ◊

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